Did you hear about the man from Sunderland who thought it a good idea to stick a firework up his backside?
The 22-year old soldier inserted a firework between his buttocks before lighting it. Within seconds he learnt his lesson as he fell to the floor. Taken to Sunderland Royal Hospital, he was treated for burns to his colon before being released.
One can only wonder what he thought might happen. But the pain is a small price to pay for the fame he has now achieved, in the papers, on the internet and throughout Sunderland.
He is not the first person to suffer the consequences of what can only be described as ridiculous stupidity.
How about the man in Indiana who grew marijuana in his back garden? One day he received a phone call from the police saying he had been found out but if he took the plant down to the sheriff’s office he couldn’t be prosecuted. When he appeared at reception brandishing the plant he was escorted away by officers who then put him into custody. Need I say it, the call was a hoax!
Or Geoff, the Welsh rugby fan who took his love for the game a step too far. Geoff, 26, from Caerphilly in Wales, had announced to his friends “If Wales wins, I’ll cut my balls off.” before Wales' game with England in 2005. Wales won - their first victory over England in 12 years. Shortly after the game Geoff emerged from the toilets having kept his promise. Newly-castrated Geoff was taken to hospital where he remained in a seriously ill condition.
And finally, the Canadian man who on Halloween dressed as a mummy, covering himself from head to toe with fluffy cotton balls. As he waited for his girlfriend to get ready he sat in the kitchen and lit a cigarette. He instantly burst into flames. When the fire brigade arrived his costume was reduced to ash and he was admitted to hospital with second and third degree burns covering his entire body.
Putting a firework up your arse seems like a comparatively sensible idea. Just don't try it at home!
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